Have been enjoying time with my Grandma in the rural NZ town of Gore.
(Yes, "Gore".)
It has been pleasant, and not bloody in the slightest. We have been imbibing copious amounts of "Lady Grey" tea (nicer than Earl Grey, we think!), drinking wine with every tasty meal, talking late into the night, and taxing our brains with cryptic crossword puzzles, among other things.

1-across: "It is true, there is no stomach on the handyman." (8)

Grandma is one of those wonderful ladies who has the mental alertness of someone half her age (she's an 80-something) - the eyesight and the knees are becoming a hinderance to her confidence and activity, but all other systems are "go". I only wish I could magically fix the knees and improve the vision. So does she!

Nonetheless, it has been a good time thus far, and I only wish that visiting her was as easy as stepping through my wardrobe door back home, to emerge from the cupboard door in her hallway, in Gore.

When is someone going to be considerate enough to make step-through portals that work?
Doors are all very well and fine, but if the rooms are right next to each other, I think that's cheating really.

Love you lots, Grandma!
xxx

By the way, #1 across =

CRYPTIC SPOILER!
CRYPTIC SPOILER!
CRYPTIC SPOILER!
CRYPTIC SPOILER!
CRYPTIC SPOILER!

;)

"Factotum."